Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day 7

Nebraska to Utah, this is our longest drive, nine hours in one stretch.

A few observations from my vantage point one third of the way through Wyoming.

1- I am amazed at how well the girls have done. We have actually had fun on our long journey, and they have been so accommodating and well-behaved for the last seven days in the car.

2- Every town has something to offer. An indoor water park, a mountain man museum, a state park, even a great gas station. But, the best has to be from Wyoming when earlier today I saw a sign telling me not to miss the chance to pull off and see the world's smallest city: population 1. Seriously. Basically, advertising for me to stop and see NOTHING.

3- It is truly amazing how much the landscape changes as you drive across the country and how each area is beautiful in its own way.

4- I need to secure a few more musical soundtracks as I have exhausted all of those I have on the I-pod and find them to be the best distraction when driving.

5- I would be willing to pay large sums for a drug that prevents the bladder from needing to empty for over 12 hours. So much more expeditious to never have to stop the car on a road trip.

6- Someone needs to help small communities more clearly market their wares to travelers. Often signs just don't make any sense. Like one outside of Hannibal, Missouri which boasted the world's "Oldest and Newest Mark Twain Caverns" -- what in the heck is that supposed to mean?

7- Finally, as we finish our own pioneer trek, I feel for them in having to ever walk across all of Wyoming. I am pretty sure that nothing in life requires more perservearance, determination, and sheer will power than getting through Wyoming. Even in a car. It is endless. It feels like such a continuous display of nothing that I wonder that more of them didn't just turn around in the belief that they would NEVER arrive anywhere worthwhile via that path. I felt like doing it a few times today myself.

In the end we did finally reach the Rocky Mountains, the landscape shifted, and we safely arrived in Utah. Exhausted, but all is well.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day 6

Today we visited Liberty Jail (where I again was glad I had been before since I spent the tour outside with Elsie Jane), Adam-ondi-Ahman, and Winter Quarters, Nebraska.

It was a day of detours. Nothing was exactly on our way. And then, we literally had to go an hour and a half out of our way when the freeway in Missouri and Iowa was completely shut down. After all the driving and so many late nights, I considered skipping the detour into downtown Omaha to visit Winter Quarters and just pressing forward, but I am so glad I didn't.

The Mormon Trail Visitor's Center lies adjacent to the Mormon Pioneer Cemetery in Nebraska, with the Winter Quarter's temple built on the same plot of land. Over 600 pioneers are buried there, but it is dedicated to all of the thousands who died along the route to Utah but were buried in shallow or unmarked graves. Our missionary tour guide told us that Elder Christofferson recently visited them there and told them that never had he visited another temple where he could sense such a constant presence of angels around it. Being there the spirit of the great Mormon exodus was enveloping.

Mia and Maggie both commented on how much they could feel the spirit as they learned about the pioneers who left all they had behind to walk West. They were amazed by their sacrifices and the miracles they witnessed. More than any other thing we have done as a family, I have felt my children's testimonies and understanding of the spirit grow on this trip.

As we pulled out of Omaha, our belongings in our car and McDonald's to eat along our way, Jeffrey and I discussed how life changing this week has been for us. It is hard to put into words, but it has been a humbling experience to visit so many sacred places, to follow the whole history and beginnings of the church, to reflect on so many miracle and visitations so much sacrifice and precaution, and most of all to be inspired by so much faith.

Before I left our home in Virginia I felt a kinship to my forbearers who had also left behind beloved homes to travel West into the unknown. As we have made this trip and I have simultaneously learned and thought more on their experiences while facing my own sorrow, fears, and uncertainty, as well as hope and anticipation about this move, I have felt buoyed up in my own challenges and weaknesses by their faith. I have felt a deepening of my commitment and conviction to always be true to the gospel, to follow the Lord with exactness, and to never retreat from what I know to be right no matter how daunting it may appear.

What a remarkable blessing this experience has been to me. How humbled I am to admit that I would not have grown as much nor likely have had the same powerful, spiritual experiences if all had happened as I had hoped and we had sold our home and lined up a new one and put everything in order prior to leaving Virginia. Instead, once again, the Lord has blessed me by answering my prayers with a gentle rebuke to be patient and wait upon Him because He has greater things in mind for me than just appeasing my need to have everything go my way and happen in my timeframe; he is blessing me in far more nuanced and internally transformative ways, often through the very "trials" that I pray so fervently to have removed.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day 5

We drove south today from Chicago to Carthage Illinois, site of the martyrdom of the Prophet Joseph Smith.

I was grateful I had been here before since Elsie Jane was incapable of quietly holding still and not disturbing the tour. While Jeffrey, Mia and Maggie walked through the original jail (the first historic site ever purchased by the church), I watched Elsie Jane run around the grounds and reflected on the last time I had been to Carthage and Nauvoo.

Twelve years ago Jeffrey and I were engaged and working in Washington, DC as interns when I visited Carthage and Nauvoo with Mom, Erin, Aunt Cheryl and Grandma and Grandpa Tuttle. Grandma and Grandpa had been serving as missionaries nearby in Bowling Green, Missouri. That day, we picnicked with them on the banks of the Mississippi River and then toured the church history sites. In my recollections, Grandma and Grandpa were so happy then. They were healthy and excited to show us around. They were, of course, well beloved by the people in their small branch. Today, I felt so grateful for those memories. It is hard to believe that both of them are gone now. Amazing to think of all that has transpired since then.

As I stood under a big tree outside the Carthage Jail, I was overcome with a sudden sense of grief, a knowledge of how moments in life can never be recaptured and opportunities to express love can never be regained. I felt appreciation for my grandparents' unwavering commitment and dedication to the church, which has led to my faith and my ability to share it with my children. And, I experienced a powerful, distinct sense of closeness to them. I felt for a moment their presence with me, there in Carthage. I knew that more often than I realized they were near, watching over me and my little family.

The Christmas that my grandparents were missionaries they sent me a leaf, encased in plastic with my name written on it in gold. It was a simple book mark, taken from the leaves that fell outside of Carthage Jail that fall. Today, as I waited for my family to finish their tour, I looked down to find one, single leaf -- the same size and shape from the same tree outside of Carthage Jail -- and for just a moment I imagined my grandparents sending their love to me again.

Mia and Maggie left Carthage Jail in awe. I was pleased to sense their reverence and appreciation for Joseph Smith.

We ate sandwiches and sang hymns on our drive to Nauvoo. (A month ago we selected four hymns that related to the places we would visit on our journey to learn together as a family, a way to help internalize some of what we would experience.) We read the history of Nauvoo and recounted the story of the rebuilding of the Nauvoo Temple.

In Nauvoo we enjoyed visiting the various shops and homes and learning about the lives of the saints during that era. We marveled at the beauty of the temple. We took pictures. The girls enjoyed getting cookies and bricks and rings made of nails.

Most of all, I marveled at all that was sacrificed to follow the Lord. I reflected on how many people were willing to sell businesses, property and homes, to leave family, friends, and all that they knew to join with the saints and create a whole new life. I noted how the Lord brought the knowledge, skills, and expertise needed into the community through the converts who arrived. And, most of all, I learned about how sacrifice is always required in life, but it is willingness to sacrifice, to do whatever the Lord commands, to not second-guess or put one's own desires first that makes all the difference.

Yesterday, I felt some despair, but the gift of today, of Carthage and Nauvoo, was hope and peace.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day Four

I am sitting right now on a section of sandy beach on Lake Michigan that is accessed just behind a great little neighborhood park just blocks from Uncle Nassir and Aunt Shamela's apartment building in down town Chicago. We rode the bus down Michigan Avenue this morning and had brunch at the American Girl Place Cafe. Then, we spent the bulk of the day at the Field Museum. On days like today I think I could be happy living in a big city, trading a yard and big home for busy streets and cultural experiences, fabulous architecture and nice parks.

The girls are happily wading in the water and digging in the sand after playing pirates on the play ground. The park is full of picnickers and people shooting off bottle rockets. If we decide to tonight we can watch fireworks over Navy Pier from the balcony. It does make me wonder a bit how I will feel about life in Boise Idaho, especially since my greatest challenge in Manassas was feeling like I was too far from the amenities of DC.

Today, I awoke from a dream in which I was looking for a new home in Boise. It was a weird dream, complete with ruling out a neighborhood where the homes were too small but amazing cottages that looked like they came out of Fantasyland at Disneyland. But, odd as it was, it left me feeling anxious about finding the right place to live, and even more, about the fact that despite increased interest, we still have not sold our house. I feel like we are doing the right thing and all will work out well, but I so wanted to have a contract on our home by the time Jeffrey and I got to Boise to house hunt, and now I have only 4 more days left.

I have to admit that today I feel worried. I want so much to be able to be settled by the time Jeffrey starts work and the girls start school at the end of August.

I have had great peace in my heart, but today I have fear. I wish I didn't, but it is just where I am at.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day Three

Reminder to self: I NEED hotel-quality blackout curtains in every bedroom in my new home. I cannot recall the last time every member of the family slept until 9:45!

Today we managed to get a late breakfast and then find a church to attend just outside of Cleveland. The timing worked amazingly to let us do this and then get to the Kirtland Temple for a tour during their limited Sunday hours. Since we were just in Kirtland 16 months ago, we determined not to revisit the other sites, such as the Whitney Store and the Johnson Farm. We had a great experience at both last year, but got to the temple about 10 minutes too late for a tour. So, we made certain to arrive in time today.

The tour was interesting and informative, and it was amazing to just be there and reflect on all that had occurred within those walls. On the way out of Kirtland Jeffrey and I re-listened to a great talk by Elder Ballard on "What Came from Kirtland?" and again marveled at the significance of all that occurred there in the formation of the church. Elsie Jane was a little restless, but the other two girls were quite good. Our tour guide's perspective was a little different coming from the Community of Christ's perspective, but he was a graduate student of their religious history and knew a lot and was very respectful of our differences in belief and interpretation. We were grateful to have been there with him.

We fixed sandwiches in the car and plowed through with only one stop and a brief venture off the toll road for about a quarter mile up a random road into Sturgis, so that Jeffrey could officially say he had been to Michigan.

We made it to Uncle Nassir and Aunt Shamela's building by about 10 pm, where of course they were waiting to offer us their room, dinner, and anythingnelse we could wish for.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day Two

This was the day for our trip to finally begin. After breakfast at the hotel, a short swim, and getting everyone ready and the car reloaded we commence our drive to Fayette.

Already in the trip I am grateful for several things: a DVD player and the new, $55 earphones that we just bought for this trip; the bag of bribes we purchased for the girls, including these ridiculous tiny rubber toys called Squinkies that Maggie discovered recently and just HAD to have; tons of snacks that we packed for the road.

Fayette is the location where the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was first organized in 1830 at the Peter Whitmer Farm. We visited with a very, sweet, attentive eight year old, who I was surprised knew the names of all three witnesses to the Book of Mormon on her own. Mia loved the tour, had long conversations with the missionary who was our guide, and commented on how strongly she could feel the spirit there. We also visited with a very grouchy, unhappy, tired five year old who spent most of the visit sulking, whining, and complaining that she was too tired to walk and an overactive two yer old who picked up pieces of china in the visitor center, sang happy birthday loudly, and was very unhappy when I would not let her try out all the beds.

While our tour was a little too long for the kids, the spirit was there. I was particularly struck about the very human side of the origins of the church, the extent to which those involved in what in my mind, with years of perspective on the events, were world-altering events could have had so little concept of all that was occurring. I thought about the faith required to sacrifice so much of your life, personal space, and family for such a fledgling cause. I loved hearing of Mary Whitmer who was exhausted by all the personal sacrifices that she and her family were making to provide a place for the prophet Joseph Smith to translate and hold meetings and live. She was the only woman to receive a personal, visual witness of the Book of Mormon, not given to her -- as it was to others -- to allow her to testify to the world and add to the veracity of Joseph's testimony, but instead as a mercy of the Lord to help sustain her in her work at this time.

Then, we drove to Palmyra via McDonalds in Canandaigua. I wanted to stop in Canandaigua and drive through the spots where Jeffrey and I spent our honeymoon, but there was not time, so we pressed on.

Somewhere during the portion of the trip, perhaps in finishing her double cheeseburger, Mia discover that she had a very loose, very sore tooth. This put a damper on the rest of the journey for her. We drove past Martin Harris' home and then visited the Grandin printing shop. Elsie was very over-tired and Mia's tooth bothered her so much, we did not finish the tour. Maggie was convinced we had been there before, but actually was just mistaking it for Franklin's print shop in Philadelphia.

We spent some time walking through the Sacred Grove. The best comment there came from Maggie. She told me, "Mom, you know how in my Kit Kitteridge movie when Kit is really happy she starts to cry, but she is not sad. And then, I sometimes feel like crying when I watch it. Well, that is how I feel now, really happy but like I am going to cry." It was a beautiful moment to walk along with her and help her identify that what she felt was the spirit telling her that the truth of what occurred there.

After visiting the Smith family log home and the Hill Cumorah (where the girls enjoyed watching a man reenacting Joseph Smith extracting the golden plates from under a large rock in preparation for the pageant) they all slept during our drive to Niagara Falls.

A few notes if you ever decide to make a similar journey: first, if you do not go during the pageant there are not crowds and you get nice, personal tours at the sites in Palmyra. If you go into Niagara Falls and want to cross to Canada there are three bridges -- check online on the way to see what the wait is to cross the border. Luckily we did this and took the less popular peace bridge which avoided the 1-2 hour wait to get in.

Niagara was beautiful but crowded since it was the weekend of US Independence day and Canada Day. I even googled it and I still am not quite sure what Canada Day really is about, but it meant that there were thousands of Indians and Pakistanis and Afghans at Niagara picnicking and walking about. Go figure.

After ice cream cones that were about four times too large for any of us, but apparently the smallest size served by the froyo place at Niagara, we determined that once safely back in the US we ought to feed the kids a real dinner. Olive Garden at 9:45 pm was not really what I had in mind, but it is a vacant, right? In the end we were driving again at after midnight, tired, and this time in a rain storm.

I was grateful to make it to Cleveland safely by 1:30 am and again collapse into bed.

Cross Country Trip Field Notes: Day One

Our journey began late, as always seems to be the case when we are traveling across the country. This being the first time we have taken the children on such long road trip, we planned to drive in shorter spurts in the evening and spend the days on activities.

Day one was spent at the temple for the sealing of our dear friends, the Sotos. What a sweet way to complete our time living in Virginia. But, the two hours of traffic that Jeffrey and I sat in trying to pick up the kids very quickly added to the luster of our move to Idaho. After traffic, delays, forgetting things, and a glitch in dropping Jeffrey's car off at the airport we did not get on the road until 6:30, and then everyone was ready to stop for dinner. After eating in Leesburg, we finally commenced our drive to New York.

It was way too late and after having packed the car, finished packing the house, and cleaned the house perfectly for the two groups that were coming with realtors to look at the house on Friday, we were exhausted.

Just before Scranton, we realized we were not going to make it to Rochester and called to change our hotel reservation to Syracuse. After driving in shifts and doing everything possible to stay awake we made it safely there at 2:30 am.

Since the kids had slept in the car for 4-5 hours, they woke up and were ecstatic to realize we were staying in a suite with a hide-a-bed couch. Fortunately, everyone calmed and slept.

Just grateful, and a bit sad, to finally be on our way.

Things I am looking forward to in Idaho

Cooler summers
Cafe Rio
Having family a five hour drive away
Jeffrey working at home
No commute
Shorter drive times
Horseback riding for Mia
More options in schools
Snow
Hiking, biking, skiing (if I learn how)
Decorating a new house
Lower cost of living

And, hopefully many other things I just don't know about yet.