Happy Fourth!

Maggie turned four on January sixth; right now her life is all about independence. In celebration of Maggie's fourth, here are four ways that Maggie demonstrates her independence.

1- Maggie goes to preschool and (finally!) primary at church, and she loves both.

She is learning her letters and get super-excited when she spots an "M" or "S" or "P" on a sign or in book. She knows her months of the year and the days of the week -- although she can never figure out when an anticipated event is going to occur. "Today is my birthday?" "No, Maggie, next week." "Today is my birthday?" "No, Maggie, remember it is in five more days." "Today is my birthday?" "Nope, let's count it out on your fingers again." And so on through Christmas and Auntie Ellie's visit and playdates and every other exciting experience. She loves listening to her CD from her preschool teachers, singing the "weather watcher" song, and telling about her job in the classroom after school.

Maggie is also so happy to be in Primary, like Mia. On Saturday she realized that I was preparing clothes for church the next morning. "I don't want to go to church," she immediately stated. "But, Maggie," I countered, "You're in Primary now." That did it, in an instant she was jumping up and down, cheering to get to go to church the next day. She has learned three or four new songs perfectly in just a couple of weeks, and she is so happy to tell us all she is learning about Jesus.

2- Maggie is also becoming very capable. She makes her own bed and can clean her own room, when she wants to. She likes to help Elsie Jane and tote her around (much to Elsie's dismay). She dresses herself and can even do her own buttons and buckles.

She is amazing with technology. She can put on movies, play games on the computer, work her own CD player, and find the songs she wants on the i-pod -- although this summer I caught her in a moment of frustration yelling at her i-pod, "No, I-pot, no! I not want dis song!" So, she can work it pretty well, but has yet to figure out that it will not cooperate with her better if she screams at it. (I am trying to teach her that same lesson regarding moms, dads, and sisters, but it has not totally sunk in yet.)

3- Maggie does everything Maggie's way. She has a fiery temper and knows very well how to express herself. A couple months ago as I tried to convince her to get dressed for church she stormed away, ripped off the dress I had helped her put on, and replaced it with her black leggins and a black and pink pirate shirt (which she calls her "angry shirt" since she thinks the pirate's face looks angry), she stormed back in and just glared at me -- her outfit said it all.

At night, Maggie has to have the light on. If the light is not on and she wakes up in the night it sends her into a total panic. Angry and completely without her senses, Maggie will make her way into my room and up onto the foot of her poor, unsuspecting parents' bed. Then, without warning, she will begin to yell, letting each word out at the top of her lungs, elongating the sounds, and taking long breaths in between each, so that they come out in a staccato fashion: "Who....turned....out....my ....LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

As the mother who gets woken by what at first can appear to be a demonic, wailing apparition, I always wake with my heart pounding and a bit fearful of the form hovering directly over my head, yelling at me. But, after I calm down and make my apologies, I try to help calm and escort Maggie back into her bed.

Maggie pretty much only eats cheese and carbohydrates. Quessadillas, mac and cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches, nachos. I can sneak in some whole grains and beans, and lately I have been introducing dried fruits, but it is a very limited repertoire. She refuses to try anything new. Even with her intense love of sugar, Maggie can not be persuaded by the promise of a treat. She will go hungry before trying something she doesn't like. To maintain my sanity, I have put her on the "eat-what-I-fix-or-PB&J" meal plan. It seems to be a decent compromise.

4- In no arena is Maggie's independence more clear than in her fashion sense.

Maggie's primary focus in reading a book, watching a movie, looking at art work in the museum, or any other activity, is to attend to the attire of others. She scans all media for clothing, shoes and accessories that she informs me she would also like to wear.

I guess I should be grateful that she has moved beyond the phase of only wearing nightgowns and that she does wear clothes now. But, her choices are limited by the fact that she will not tolerate any denim. In addition, she likes to combine printed tights and funky knee high socks with most everything she chooses. The other day I picked her up from a playdate to discover I had let her go wearing only bright pink , footless tights and a gray shirt with her cowgirl boots. Today, we had a good fight over the fact that she could not wear a similar outfit to school -- pants or a skirt with the legging tights are required I said -- Maggie was not pleased.

I told Maggie that when she started school she had to let me fix her hair (which she has never previously tolerated), and -- amazingly -- it worked. She does let me fix it now. The problem is that she wants all sorts of specific hair-dos that won't work with the length of her hair. She got a book from Grandma for Christmas with "American Girl Doll Hairstyles" in it and likes to select at random from the book each morning. This would be fine if she had long, American Girl Doll hair, but since all the styles won't work for her hair, this just makes it impossible to satisfy her and guarantees that she will just pull her hair out as soon as I get it finished, telling me that it is not right and demanding that I do it again.



In addition to all of her independence, Maggie is a sweet, bright, sensitive child.

She loves her family. Sometimes her adoration drives Mia a little batty, but she would do anything for Mia. She idolizes her. She thinks her dad can walk on water. She talks incessantly about her extended family, all of her aunts and uncles, grandparents, and cousins, in turn. She wants to know about them; she wants to visit them. She remembers all sorts of details about them, like what they liked to eat when we went to Utah last summer. Maggie says the sweetest prayers and talks about the welfare of each member of her family.

Maggie's biggest fear is that she will be left out in the family -- which is probably very typical for the middle child. This leads to some darling conversations that are perplexing for me to answer.

Frequently, we will talk about an event or see a picture of something that happened prior to Maggie's birth. She will listen to the story or look attentively at the picture, and then ask, "Where was I?"

"Well, Maggie," I will explain, "You weren't born yet, remember."

"But who was taking care of me?" she will continue.

"Well, you were still living with Heavenly Father, so He took care of you."

"But, who was watching me?" she will insist. "Was Nama babysitting me?"

"No, Maggie, you weren't born yet."

"Was Grandma babysitting me?"

"No Maggie."

"Why did you leave me? Who was being my mommy then?"



This year for Maggie's birthday, Nama, Uncle Bobby, and Aunt Ellie came to visit, which was the highlight of her celebration. Coming in second was her Felicity doll from Grandma and Grandpa. Third was her Thumbelina party. She loved her cake; she has been anticipating it for months, planning the perfect cake, but when her birthday actually came, she blew out the candles and refused to eat a bite. She doesn't like frosting she informed me.

Here are the highlights in pictures.